Bienvenidos!

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Thoughts on raising children

It's the third of January and I have already failed at my new year's resolution. I decided I wanted to be nicer to my husband, but since we got back from my parents' yesterday all I have done is bitch and snipe at him. I kept telling myself: be Mamma, don't be Narnie, but all I can see is me turning into a bitter old harridan.
I have issues with how he acts towards MiniMoo. All I ever seem to hear from him is 'No. Don't. Not now. Stop that' negative negative negative all the time. Withdrawal of 'priveleges' over minor infractions. Inconsistent application of discipline. Causing friction where there doesn't need to be. Imposing his will on him just because he wants to. I know I am far from a perfect parent but I at least try to let him just be himself and to pay him attention. M would rather sit playing on his phone than interact with him. He seems unable to spend time with the boys without relying on some sort of screen to entertain them or himself. He jumps in and takes over when I was dealing with a situation. And I don't know how to talk to him about it because he takes everything as a personal attack or claims that it's because he sees so much of himself in minimoo that he's trying to stop him (mini) from turning into him (big). I've tried to explain that that shouldn't mean he has to completely stamp all over mini moo's character in the process. He doesn't listen to me. Stupid things like running the bath for the boys, checking the temperature with his wrist or elbow not his hand.. half the times he runs it I have to correct the temperature because it's either too hot or too cold cos he's just stuck his hand in and thought 'oh that will do'. One time he left minimoo naked, wet from the bath standing there shivering with the bathroom window open because apparently minimoo had said he wanted me to dry him but I was busy putting baby G to bed, so instead of putting a towel round him and telling him mummy would be there in a minute he just let him stand there getting cold. He was three years old! Is it too much for M to just think for a second?! It makes me so angry! He still can't seem to put the boys ahead of himself and I am running out of ways to suggest he does things differently and just turning into a horrible nag. And causing arguments. Which is why I'm currently lying on our bed in the dark avoiding going back downstairs because I know that's what's waiting for me.

9:05 p.m. - 2016-01-03

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