Bienvenidos! ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- In the bleak Midwinter So. Christmas. One camp staunchly espousing their 'right' to a big normal Christmas, and the other eschewing the baubles and cheer because they've 'always hated Christmas'. I love Christmas. Not for the over priced tat, not for the decorations, or parties, or even the presents. I love it because it's the one time of year when all my family gathers together just for a few days and it's wonderful. To expand - I don't live anywhere near my family, or my Significant Other's family. Here, where we live, it's just us four. Even a lot of our friends have moved away over the years. And although in normal times we would go and see my parents every couple of months, it was always a bit hit and miss as to who else was around. But Christmas, that's different. My brothers come home. My oldest friends are usually around at some point. Between Christmas and my grandmother's birthday on the 28th, my mum, dad, brothers, aunts, cousins, gran and a multitude of old family friends are just in and out of everybody's houses. I'm lucky, my family are awesome and I get along with them so well. My cousin gets drunk and tells everyone she loves them. My grandma gets drunk and starts singing. The guitars come out. E usually ends up dancing in his vest and G starts wrestling with his uncles. I get a few nights sleep. Food and wine are plentiful, we are surrounded by love and for a few days everything is just right. Family traditions, like the pantomime (33 years running as of last year), crispy duck pancakes on Christmas eve, taking my other grandmother to church and singing the carols as loud as I dare, the boxing day party and the birthday buffet.. all those things that add up to my midwinter celebration.. all those things that I will miss this year, for the sake of keeping people safe. I worry though, because my grandmothers are old.. what if they die anyway and I have missed out on seeing them and telling them I love them? I was denied that with my Grandpa and it still hurts. I worry that if I stay away and don't hug them, what if I never get to again? So this year feels small, and sad, and I don't know how we will make it still special for the boys when it's just us, here, by ourselves. I am woefully unprepared this year and quickly running out of time. 9:43 p.m. - 2020-12-10 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
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