Bienvenidos!

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Sneezy Doc

First Attempt
My plan for today was to go to the deli to finalise the christmas hamper, have something to eat then come home and wrap presents and pack for saturday. It has not happened. We did the deli and the food bit but I have not wrapped a single present or even opened the suitcase. Now deciding whether I want to keep all the presents here, wrap them next week and take them on christmas eve instead. I don't know.

Just re-read that and realised how boring it sounds. This is what my life has become!

Second attempt
I've been sneezing all day. It's not pleasant. SuperMoo has this weird thing where every time I confess to a symptom he has to top it, even when he's not sick! He had the flu once and now worries every time he sneezes that he's coming down with something, like when I wake up in the middle of the night with violent D and V (which tends to happen once or twice a year - the perils of working in a hospital I think), he starts complaining he feels queasy too, but nothing ever happens! Then he gets upset when I don't take him seriously... Poor lamb.

Right. Serious time now. I've been giving serious thought to not renewing my pill prescription next time it runs out. My reasoning being: there will never be a 'right time'; there will always be something - "oh, lets just wait until we've got a house/you've graduated/I've passed my exams" and before you know it I'll be 40 and have lost my chance; it's too easy to do nothing, to change nothing; I don't want to be a career woman - that's not who I am; I want to have kids young enough to enjoy them when they're little and to have fun when they're grown up, instead of spending my 40s looking after them and 50s fighting with them; I don't think SuperMoo wants to be an old dad. The reasons against - do I want my life turned upside down when I'm kind of happy the way it is? (Conversely, would I be missing out on something amazing?) Do I want this little smelly, demanding, expensive dependent? Is there even a point trying to think about this rationally?

10:30 p.m. - 2010-12-16

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